Do You Suffer From Imposter Syndrome?

A rather disturbing trend I’m seeing with clients lately is  that of imposter syndrome. If you’re not familiar with the term, it essentially means that one feels as if they are a fake or are just skating through, and they constantly worry that they will be ‘found out.’  More formally, it is self-doubt about one’s accomplishments and worry of being exposed as a fraud.

Low or lack of self-esteem is at the root of this syndrome. When one does not feel good about themselves, they will attach this negative view to their skills, abilities, and achievements despite being proficient in them, such as  an individual who is promoted to a supervisor role but doesn’t feel they should have the job or are being effective. This could lead them to hide in the background, allowing their peers to take more of a leader role, or to be hesitant when making decisions.

Imposter syndrome is a form of self-sabotage where one does not feel they deserve to have the things they want, either never going after them or, once having them, do something to mess it up (i.e. continually late for work, don’t finish projects, etc.). These negative feelings only lead to more negativity, along with stress and anxiety and a host of physical and emotional problems if left unattended.

Here are three quick tips to help you stop this cycle so you can live more authentically and successfully:

1. Be self-aware – the only way to create new habits (which is what you will be doing) is to be aware of your thoughts, feelings, actions, etc. Pay attention to your thoughts and body sensations when you start to have a negative thought about yourself or you have a physical feeling, such as a tightness in your chest of stomach, jittery, neck or back pain, and the like. This is when you want to…..

2. STOP – when you are aware of your thoughts and feelings,you can then slow them down so they don’t get out of control. Taking deep breaths is a great way to gain control over your head and body so you can now think more clearly. Deep breathing is a great brain refresher, also, which helps with focus and attention.

3. Own your ‘stuff’ – you must begin to recognize your greatness; write down daily any compliments you hear, actions people take, i.e. holding the door open for you or letting you into traffic, as people recognize you; also write down any actions you take towards others as well as any accomplishments you have during the day – no matter if big or small.  This helps with self-esteem and self-belief, both of which lead to being confident in all areas of your life.

By creating new positive habits, the imposter mask will fall off and you will be able to stand fully in your authenticity  and do your best work. You will feel confident in taking advantage of opportunities and be present with others. Using the above techniques daily will help you to be your own champion and stand fully in your  excellence.

If you want to stop the struggle  and get clarity on your business or career goals, why not get some help –  contact me today to get started.

Confidence is a Mindset

How confident do you feel on a daily basis? Do you feel confident in work but not in your personal life, or vice-versa? How can you get more of it so you can go after the very things you say you want?
Confidence is a self-belief in your abilities and talents; it means that, no matter what, you act on what you think is right and true. It also means that the achievements you’ve had build your self-esteem and self-efficacy so that you won’t hesitate when the next achievement comes up.
Confidence starts in the mind and with the stories you tell yourself, which then turn into beliefs. It’s the beliefs that hold us and can be difficult to change. Someone can tell you that you are the best leader, speaker, dancer, etc. but, if you don’t fundamentally think so, then it won’t matter what they say. So how do you build confidence, or is it even possible to do so?
Yes, it is possible but it means retraining your brain, which is like a muscle – the more you exercise it, the more it will build and work favorably:

  • begin to be aware of your self-talk, as this is the culprit for our problems; if you keep repeating words you’ve either heard, or attach to yourself, the more those become your beliefs (‘you’re so stupid’ ‘you’ll never get that promotion’ ‘you’re so lazy’ and the like). It may be helpful to write these messages down to make you more aware of when you’re saying them
  • reframing those negatives into positives will strengthen the parts of the brain responsible for emotion and thought. By reframing them, it works to see that your thoughts are not black or white thinking; for example, the ‘you’re so lazy’ thought can now become ‘you’re not lazy; sure, there are times when you procrastinate on a task but think of how fearful you are that you might mess it up and disappoint someone. But remember times when you pushed past a fear and made something happen’
  • go back and write past successes so you can see that you have the ability to reach your goals, no matter how big or small; write your ‘wins’ each day, to build off them. The more you do this, the stronger those positive thoughts will be the norm

Confidence is needed in all areas of your life – in your relationships, as a parent, as a worker, as a leader – I could go on. Once confidence is there, the more you will achieve; nothing can stop you from going higher and higher in what you can do.
Committed to Your Success Coaching & Consulting focuses on workplace happiness and organizational success. If you need help gaining clarity on your business or career goals, why not get some help – stop the struggle and call today to get started! or Visit our other blog at https://cysoaching .com or

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