Blog ~ Committed to Your Success Coaching & Consulting

March 25, 2026March 25, 2026

Your Feelings Are Not Always Accurate

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If you find that you are feeling sad, depressed, angry, upset or any rage of strong emotions, you are entitled to your feelings. But there’s a problem.

Just because you feel something, doesn’t necessarily mean that it is accurate. You might be scratching you head right now and asking how can this be; how can it be that emotions and feelings are not the same?

Well, here’s the problem. You can’t always just go with your emotional states. Emotions occur automatically but may not be in ‘real time.’ Past experiences will arise that may not be attributed to the current situation, such as having a fear of something. If you look back, you might have been 10 years old, but those emotions imprinted on you; once an emotion is felt, it sets the ‘tone’ that relates to your present circumstances.

This is why you must challenge your thoughts to see if they are real. As humans, we develop defense mechanisms, that are meant as a protective barrier, but they can skew our way of thinking and looking at situations we encounter. Our thoughts are our thoughts, with our own perspectives.

Your feelings, while being completely owned by you, have two dimensions. There is the subjective dimension, which is what you are perceiving deep down inside. But there’s also an objective dimension to it, to try to see if from an outsider’s view.

The next time you feel an intense emotion that leads to a negative thought, take time to reflect on how true that thought is; for example, you see someone in a store and they look at you, but you think “they don’t like me” which leads to an emotion, such as sadness or anger. If you take the time to challenge that thought – how do you know they don’t like you? – you would see that it is not true and can go on about your day.

A good exercise is by Byron Katie, called The Work, where you ask 4 questions:

Is it true?
Is it absolutely true? (you can’t say yes to anything)
How do I feel when I have this thought? (identify the true emotions, putting a name to them)
How would I feel if I didn’t have this thought?

It’s a powerful tool to challenge and change your perspectives that lead to strong emotions, which can zap you emotionally. You do have choice in which thoughts you keep and which you throw away. Another good way is to write the thought down, which can give you a clearer view so you can better adapt.

“You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.” (Brian Tracy)

March 18, 2026March 18, 2026

How to Deal When People Drive You Crazy

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Do you ever find yourself meeting and interacting with people who drive you crazy? We all have, to be honest.

There’s one in every office, every family and every group you’ve ever been a part of. A person who makes your teeth itch and your blood boil. They seem to have the inside scoop on what pushes your buttons and how to get under your skin.

So how do you deal with people who frustrate you and make you impatient? How do you become calm enough to not go into a rage?

Try these tips during your next work meeting, family reunion or social event:

Remember, we all have different priorities–What you think is a priority to accomplish isn’t necessarily everyone else’s. This little recognized fact has been the cause of many spousal disagreements and work resignations. This is all about perceptions and expectations, both yours and the other persons.

Keep this fact in mind when it seems someone is resisting taking action that you believe is important. They might not be trying to drive you nuts; they might just have a different expectation and priority than yours.

Put yourself in their shoes: empathy –Sometimes, all that is necessary to take the sting of impatience out of a situation is to recognize what’s going on in the other person’s life, which we never truly know.

If they are dealing with major life events or have been under a great deal of stress lately, they probably aren’t themselves, and they certainly aren’t thinking about the fact that they might be driving you nuts. They might be worrying about their job, their marriage, or finances.. Image yourself in their situation and see if you can offer them a little empathy.

Ask yourself why they bother you so much–Could it be that they mirror a fault of your own that drives you to distraction? Are they always late and that holds everything up? Is that person not following the rules which you value? Look at your own habits. How often are you late? How frequently do you keep people waiting or expect them to wait for you? Evaluate times you may have been a rule-breaker (yes, speeding counts)?

You might actually be responding more to something you see as a character flaw in yourself, but can’t admit to. Psychology says that we usually hate traits we see in ourselves, which is projection and a defense mechanism to hide our ‘shadow self’ with our insecurities or denied traits. Recognizing these is the first step to being less judgmental and more loving.

Remember that everyone has a different natural rhythm–We don’t all march to the same drummer, and we don’t all have the same internal pace. Some people are just more laid back and have a slower rhythm, even when they are in a hurry. Driving seems to bring out the worst in others when one is in a hurry to get to an appointment while the other is taking their time.

These situations can truly be frustrating, but keep it in mind that we all have a different pace can soothe your ruffled feathers. They aren’t trying to annoy you. They are just moving at the rate that feels right to them.

Focus on their positive qualities–It’s easy to focus on the little things that irritate us, but when we do, that’s all we are able to notice. When you start feeling yourself getting impatient with them, think about what you like or respect about them. This helps put those little irritations in perspective.

You might find you actually like the person once you get to know them, so work towards that. Remember, we can’t change anyone – all we can do is change ourselves.

A last point to remember is that getting this annoyed by someone else is robbing you of your energy and emotional well-being. Which choice will you make and start working on?

If someone irritates you, it is only your own response that is irritating you. Therefore, when anyone seems to be provoking you, remember that it is only your judgment of the incident that provokes you. (Epictetus)

March 11, 2026

4 Simple Ways to Overcome Your Fear of Taking Massive Action

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Don’t fault yourself for being afraid of taking that big step–the massive action that needs to happen to realize your dreams! It’s a natural response to moving out of your comfort zone. But while you shouldn’t chastise yourself for feeling fearful, neither should you wallow in it so that you never get past it. When fear rears its ugly head, use these simple tactics to put it in perspective, move on, and reach your goals.

Recognize fear is only a feeling

Fear can feel very, very real. But it’s only an emotion that survives and thrives when we dwell on it and start to believe it. The first step in mastering your fear of taking massive action is to remember to tell yourself that fear isn’t real–that it’s only a feeling that can’t hurt you. Remember the phrase: Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real. Challenge your thoughts to change them.

Remember, everyone has experienced fear of failure

Everyone experiences fear before they try something new. Think Tony Robbins or Oprah haven’t experienced fear of failure? Sure they have, and I’m sure both have stated this in the past. Everyone has experienced fear of failure, the fear of looking like a fool, the fear of losing friends when you become too famous, too wealthy, too thin, or whatever. When a moment of panic comes over you, take a sec to look at those with success and that they overcame; reflect back on your past ‘failures’ and how you overcame them.

Take the first small step

We’ve all heard Newton’s 1st Law of Motion: A body at rest tends to stay at rest, while a body in motion tends to stay in motion. Notice that feeling of fear, and then take that first small step in spite of it. Starting small doesn’t feel threatening so you continue the actions taken. You will feel amazing after you’ve done that one little thing. You’ll realize that you can do it, and you’ll be excited to take that next step. Fear will be replaced by enthusiasm!

Use a lifeline

Sometimes we recognize fear for what it is, but can’t seem to get over the hurdle anyway. That’s the right time to call in some reinforcements. Get ahold of a friend, colleague or family member who is totally on board with your goal. Buy them a cup of coffee and talk to them about your feelings. Join a support group of others who are seeking the same goal, such as through Meetup (whatever city you’re in). Go talk to a therapist or a coach who can help you manage your fears so you go after them. You don’t have to struggle alone.

Fear is actually a way for our brains to help us manage them but, when they get to the point that they hold you back or lead to emotional and psychological problems, it’s time to do something about them. Work on these steps to manage them – you are stronger than you believe.,

“FEAR has two meanings:

Forget Everything And Run.

Face Everything And Rise.”

Which will you choose??

February 24, 2026

Living Life: Tips on How to Have a Positive Outlook Part II

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Here are the next 10 steps for creating – and maintaining – a positive outlook:

11. Listen to Good Music

Music is the only activity that engages the whole brain, so it is useful as both a

relaxation and an energizing tool. Music helps your mind relax. It

allows your subconscious to take a break from the stress and hardships

encountered during the day. By listening to your favorite songs or to music

which promotes positive thinking will help you clear your head, feel relaxed

and calm. Use this medium to your advantage and get to see the effects of

listening to good music.

12. Dream Big but Keep it Real

We all had dreams as we grew up but, somewhere along the way to adulthood

and life’s circumstances, those dreams can be put on a shelf to be forgotten.

But that doesn’t have to be so – do the things that you love to do and engage in

activities or pursuits which will help you reach your dream. Bear in mind, you

can always dream big but keep it within the boundaries of reality.

13. “Today is a Good Day!”

Starting the day off on a positive note helps you get through any challenge in

your day. Telling yourself that “Today is a Good Day” helps to release positive

hormones and elevates your emotions. Your outlook will be on positives

versus negatives. Make this a habit daily (or several times a day) to develop

this good habit.

14. “This, Too, Shall Pass”

Sometimes, when you are faced with a dilemma, there is just nothing that

you can do about it. You have to relax and let the situation take its course.

All bad things will come to an end. Take a breather. Think things over. This

is the time wherein you sometimes get to realize that the problem is not as

big as you think it is. With this, you will get to think, plan and prepare for then

best actions to take in whatever type of predicament you are facing.

15. Find Out What Happened

Having a positive outlook does not necessarily mean that you have to deny

the fact that something wrong happened. This also means that you need to

find out what went wrong. Think things through so that you will get a better

picture as to what led you to this kind of situation. This may or may not be

your fault. But if it is, you will have the opportunity to know what your

mistakes are and take the necessary actions in order to not repeat those

same mistakes in the future. As the saying goes, ‘you can’t fix what you don’t

know.”

16. Exercise Can Do Wonders

Exercises are not meant only to get a toned, well developed abs. Exercises

are necessary to jump-start your body and prepare your mind for another

day ahead of you. It will help perk up your morning. Also, doing regular

exercise routines will help you develop good routines so you feel better about yourself.

17. Self-Denial Will Do You No Good

For those who have been living a life of self-denial, changing this type of

perspective is a big change. However, if you are truly sincere about your

desire to live a life centered in optimism then you have to take this big step

towards change. Face the things which you find hard to accept before. Stop

denying that they exist. Accept them and deal with them. Everybody goes

through painful situations, not just you. But each individual is different in

terms of the ways they deal with these circumstances. Remember, you will

solve nothing and you will never be able to move on with your life if you

keep on burying your head in the sand. Denial is a good place for a very short

period of time but, eventually, you have to face the reality of your situations

and come up with solutions to solve them.

18. Start Being Proactive Versus Reactive

Take charge of your future by being proactive. You can create and shape

the circumstances which you think will likely happen if you put your heart

and efforts into it, such as mapping out steps or options you can take and how

you make decisions,

Being proactive is never easy especially if you have lived

a life as a reactive person. You can still change this and start taking charge

of your life. You are the captain of your ship, remember? You will never be

the person you want to be if you continue to live your life based on

reactive decisions. You will always be afraid and you will only have limited

options in your life. You still have time. Be proactive and start taking over

your life. Be strong, smart and fearless in achieving your goals.

19. Deal With Your Problems

When you feel that the world is crumbling down on you, you do not have to

just stay there. You can do something about it. Everybody has their own

problems. But you cannot solve these predicaments if you just keep on

wallowing in it. You have to find the solution and ways to resolve your

issues and deal with it. Solutions are there if you take time to look for them,

while being brave to face them no matter what.

20. Turn Failures Into Opportunities

Failures are not all that bad. You can still get some great opportunities out

of them. By being able to spot those opportunities in spite of the said failure

you will get to rise again and succeed, while becoming resilient along the way.

Do not just give up even if you think that failures and problems just keep on

coming. Turning your situation around starts with how you look at that

situation so focus on more positive thoughts, such as “I am strong and have

skills to get through this.” Having a more positive outlook will lessen the

negative emotions that can overwhelm you and seeing the situation in a

clearer light.

“The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible, and achieves the impossible.” — Winston Churchill

February 23, 2026

Living Life: Tips to Have a More Positive Outlook on Life

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Staying positive is not that simple, especially in our current world of weather issues, financial and job uncertainty, and the possibility of global sanctions with other nations. With all of the chaos, it’s can lead to negativity and ‘doom and gloom’ thinking.

Life is never easy, but there are ways to develop a positive outlook so you don’t wake up feeling hopeless, have anxiety, or however you respond to stressors in your life.

Staying positive is never that easy, especially if you are going through tough times. However, if you do stay positive even during these instances, you will reap the benefits of your efforts. You will be able to deal and cope with your daily routines easily. You will become more optimistic and you will be less likely to think negatively, which will just add up to your worries.

Life is never easy, but there are ways to develop a positive outlook so you don’t wake up feeling hopeless, have anxiety, or however you respond to stressors in your life.

If you make an effort to have a positive outlook in life, you will notice that you will become more efficient, more successful and happier. This is the type of state of mind which you should start developing.

You might ask, what are the characteristics of a person who has a positive

outlook in life?

Here are 10 traits that distinguish one as a positive thinker:

You might ask, what are the characteristics of a person who has a positive outlook in life?

These people are much more motivated and dedicated to reach their
They are optimistic when it comes to all the things which are
happening to their life.
These individuals are capable of thinking creatively.
These people are capable of taking everything, either good or bad,
These individuals choose to be happy rather than worry about all of
the bad things that are currently happening in their life.
They continuously seek for new opportunities.
They exude self-confidence and they feel good about themselves as well as their abilities.
They find solutions to problems rather just complaints.
They always find inspiration in all the things which they do.
They strive hard to achieve their goals and attain success.

Over these next five days, you can learn ways to develop and maintain a positive outlook

Your Expectations in Life Must Be Realistic

As with any goal, being realistic will lead to more success. While you can have those high, lofty goals, looking at them realistically, such as with time, money, people, will make them more achievable. For example, saying you want to lose 10 pounds sounds achievable but if you set the goal at losing those pounds in a two weeks to a month might not be reachable without a good diet or exercises program.

Your Past, Present and Future: Learn How to Handle It

Looking at regrets in your life won’t lead to happiness; neither will the future. Neither are areas you can control. Making peace with your past will, as will being hopeful about your future. Focus on the only area you can control, which is the present.

Be Hopeful Even During the Bad Times

Being hopeful even in times when you are facing a negative situation takes courage and strength. Being positive tells you that there are ways to manage through challenging times so you don’t get stuck there. You have been through adversity before – focus on what you did to make it through to where you are now.

Be True to Yourself

This means that you know yourself and why you do the things you do, which includes complete honesty. This is not easy but you won’t make it through if you are living for others and not yourself. This includes knowing your boundaries, accepting and loving yourself, despite your flaws, and doing what is right for you.

Use “Positive Word Only: Rule

If you are truly serious in finding your way towards having a positive outlook in life, you must learn its foundation. The use of positive words alone during your daily conversations is the foundation of having a positive attitude.

This is simple, choose the words that you use and avoid saying “you can’t”. The words that you use play an important role on how you view things. By using positive words alone, you can express yourself better, attract positive vibes; improve your mood as well as being able to appropriately express all the things which you desire. It’s helpful to create a positive words only jar, where you put a penny (or amount you choose) to drop in when you don’t say positive words – it’s a great way to change the brain, develop a good habit, plus you can save money as the jar fills up.

Make an Effort to Avoid Negative Feelings and Thoughts

If you are on a negative state of mind, you will see the world as a place which is distorted. Plus, you will always have negative emotions which will likely result to taking negative actions towards almost everything that is happening on your life. You have to break free from this cycle and start living a life which spins around a positive attitude towards everything.

Practicing thought-stopping is a good way to retrain your brain to positivity; you can put a rubber band on your wrist and snap it when a negative thought occurs, which you must then replace with 3 positive thoughts to override that negative thought.

Stop Making Excuses If you Want to Be Happy

When something negative occurs, it’s easy to place blame on others mainly to avoid self-blame. Stop the blame and take responsibility for your thoughts and actions. It is actually freeing to do so.

Positively Deal With Change

Change is a constant and inevitable. You may not realize that change occurs from small areas in our lives daily, such as getting up at a different time to go to work. As humans, we actually do not life change which is why we tend to avoid hard areas we deal with.

Dealing more positively with any change will lessen stress around the issue, make you feel safe and valued and aid in your personal growth.

Accept Your Imperfections

When working towards self-improvement, you may notice your imperfections, or those challenge areas, that make up you. We do tend to focus on those negative aspects, as how our brains are formed, which can lead to anxious or depressive feelings.

A more positive way to look at them is to see how they make you a unique person; don’t be afraid to stand out versus fitting in. Look at your strengths and skills and work on using them to live a more fulfilling life.

Smile Often

You may have heard that it takes more facial muscles to frown than to smile. The very act of smiling releases positive hormones into your body so you feel better and more connected to others. Smiling can also be contagious so others smile back. If you don’t feel like smiling, put a pencil in your mouth as it will raise the corners and release those positive hormones so you feel more positive in your mood and outlook.

Start using these today. Ten more will be posted tomorrow, so look forward to it. A positive outlook leads to a positive life.

“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results” —Willie Nelson